ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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