Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
you will always have a special place in my vag
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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