Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
