the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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