Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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