Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
