No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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