I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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