at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
