it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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