these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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