"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize