What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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