God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
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