i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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