So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
