I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
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