i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Randomize
