hotel room ftw
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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