I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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