belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Randomize
