oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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