So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
