I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
