What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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