the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
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