I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
it's like heaven, but drunker
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
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