Please, let me fuck your mom
dude i'm inner monologue high
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
