We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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