Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you

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(325): View more from Texas

I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.

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(409): View more from Texas

I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop

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(732): View more from New Jersey

we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know

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(330): View more from Ohio

He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close

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(858): View more from California

currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh

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(281): View more from Texas

Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.

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