Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
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Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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