So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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