Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
