I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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