Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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