The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Randomize