I'm lost and stupid without you.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself