Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
