Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
she pinky promised me she was 18
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I want to be your penis for a week.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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