Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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