I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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