I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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