do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
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