so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
