Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
