My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
