We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
