Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
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It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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