lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
