I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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