Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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