Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Randomize
